We've had a good thing going for about a decade now - your pants were cute, cheap [cheaper than Buckle, anyway] and a decent value. But lately, things have changed. You're prices are going up, you closed my stores so I have to buy pants online, and to be honest, your pants are crappy. The last three pairs I've owned have had issues within a month of me buying them. For the seam to split after 8 washes, or the zipper to break literally the fifth time I've worn them, I can't justify spending $60. We're over.
Thanks for finally realizing girls have long legs. Your $23 pants that are long enough for my stupid legs came just in time for me to rebound from Vanity with you, and I couldn't be happier.
Dear skinny jeans,
I know I hated on you. But I wore you yesterday for the first time and boy is it easy to put boots on with you. Not saying you're easy. Okay, maybe I am, but it's a good easy.
Dear PR people,
Please stop sending me product information about baby products. I know you don't read my blog if you want me to get behind something for infants, and if you don't take the time to at least read my 'about me' page, why in the hell would I take the time to evaluate your product? You can suck it. You get deleted without a reply.
If you get back with Chris Brown, it'll make me think less of you. [I'll probably still listen to your music though; you kinda rock.] Sorry, but it's the truth. People can change, yah, but there's no excuse for beating up girls.
Dear Utah weather,
I am completely fine with a no-snow winter. In fact, if you could skip straight to Spring at this point, I'd be alright. But please understand, if it snows any later than tax day, we're in a fight.
Thank you for kicking my ass. Really. I hurt and my muscles HATE me, but I love it. You're a blast.
Thanks for being here. This week has been wonky.
Dear [person reading this],
You are beautiful and an amazing person. Don't forget that, k?
One last thing...
If you don't laugh at this, you need more fun in your life. This is hysterical to me!